jason thurber's blog

globally-scoped ramblings

Archive for the ‘humor’ Category

Thanksgiving: The Movie

with 2 comments

Jay Pinkerton’s: Thanksgiving – The Movie

Man, I haven’t laughed this hard since… well… probably an earlier post from Jay.

Written by jthurber

November 2nd, 2005 at 5:29 pm

Posted in humor

HowTo: Secure XML/WS Servers

with 23 comments

Rory Blyth – Neopoleon.com

The best security in the universe is to not have an application to break into in the first place.

Written by jthurber

October 23rd, 2004 at 6:51 am

Seen on slashdot.

without comments

While discussing the G5 benchmarks.

Real-world benchmarks
In iTunes on my dual-G5 I can stop the M.C. Hammer track, “U Can’t Touch This” in less than a 10th of second.

Written by jthurber

November 10th, 2003 at 6:30 pm

Posted in humor

The Poetry of Rumsfeld

without comments

I heard about this on NPR yesterday. Apparently there’s also a book of Rumsfel poetry being published. Enjoy.

Written by jthurber

June 30th, 2003 at 1:55 pm

Posted in humor

When life gives you lemons…

without comments

waffles rabid dog shit-ade shit hand

Written by jthurber

June 15th, 2003 at 2:28 pm

Posted in humor

Dennis Miller ’88 vs. ’03

with 22 comments

Good stuff

DENNIS MILLER (1988): We were all scared when those planes swan-dived into the towers, OK? But what separates real Americans from the faux variety is that real Americans don’t turn in their spines to the hatcheck lady in times of stress. People in this country today hear the word terrorist and immediately snap into action — which means locking themselves in the loo, defecating on the Constitution and using the Bill of Rights to wipe their ass. We’re made of better stuff than that, and all the shrieking Rush Limbaughs in the world are not worth one brave man who will stand up and say, “hey, the emperor is starkers, and besides that, he wants all of Yemen’s oil.” I wasn’t around, but I’m pretty sure the guys at Valley Forge weren’t eating sautéed rat three times a day so that a future president could attempt a three-point landing on an aircraft carrier moored three miles off the coast of Catalina Island. We have to respond to terrorism, but the problem is that we’re running around like the lynch mob in The Ox-Bow Incident, and when Hank Fonda stands up and says we got the wrong guy, Jane Darwell whacks him on the head with a gun butt and the next thing you know you wake up behind barbed wire at Guantanamo. All I’m saying is that it’s time to scrap the Merle Haggard diplomacy, OK? Oh, and the reason we haven’t found any weapons of mass destruction is that they’re all in a warehouse in Topeka waiting for the next right-wing militia asshat to work his hatred of the federal government to a sufficient boiling point due to the fact that the local TV station has once again cancelled Dukes of Hazzard. While we’re running around the world like Barney Fife at a jaywalkers convention, it’s good to know that our schools are shit, our economy is floundering, and they’ll have universal health care in Kabul before we have it here…

Written by jthurber

June 8th, 2003 at 11:05 am

Posted in humor

Geeky toaster jokes…

with 22 comments

These may be _really_ old, but I saw it for the first time this morning (via this Review):

-Sun made toasters…
The toast would burn often, but you could get a really good cuppa Java.

-Does DEC still make toasters?…
They made good toasters in the ’80s, didn’t they? – More of the same

Nothing like geek “humor” on a Saturday morning.

Written by jthurber

May 10th, 2003 at 11:34 am

Posted in humor

A short break from neverending WORK

without comments

Found this. If you haven’t read the Cluetrain Manifesto then you should skim it before reading the Gluetrain Manifesto. Some highlights:

Companies make a religion of security, but this is largely a giant red herring. Do you know how tough it is to worship a giant red herring?

Today, the org chart is hyperlinked, not hierarchical. Just try to find out who you have to make your vacation request to.

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, have seen their IPO share price quadruple on the first day of trading.

Written by jthurber

April 9th, 2003 at 6:42 pm

Posted in humor

Airport announcements

with 20 comments

Saw this over at Holy Schmoly!. You should listen to the recordings… they’re awesome!

Just a bit of humor for a Tuesday morning.

Written by jthurber

April 1st, 2003 at 9:57 am

Posted in humor